Monday, July 7, 2014

30 before 30

   If there is one thing that I am sure of it is that growing older is a scary thing. The future is unknown. You can't really plan for it. You can think you can and you can try, but you will never know what curveballs life will throw at you. (And she aims for your face sometimes!)

   I have let this horrifying feeling of turning 30 years old consume my thoughts as of late. I still have a whole year and 16 days before that even happens, yet all I can think of are ways to try and avoid the inevitable. I have gone as far as straight denial and telling my friends I will just have 29 again birthdays every year or try to start over at 21 instead. (seriously?!)

   Honestly, this feeling of fear and dread that I have doesn't even have anything to do with getting older or dying. It is more so that I haven't really accomplished anything extraordinary with my life in these nearly 30 years. I do not want to confuse or take away from every life's greatest accomplishment which I believe is love.Yes I am the mother of an extremely adorable, way too smart for his britches, sweet little boy. And yes I am finally in a relationship with a man who not only loves me and my son and takes care of us, but he also shows me kindness and respect and supports me in ways I never thought I deserved! My life is not horrible and it is not empty. I just cannot fight this internal feeling I have that I should be doing more. I should have finished more things that I started. I should not be afraid to turn 30 years old.

   I am proud to say that I have made the greatest decision that I could make for myself. I am going to embrace 30 with open arms. I want to shout from the roof tops "Bring it On 30!" I want this life of mine to be a journey, not a destination.

This is the cover of my Art Journal

With that being said I have decided to create a list. A sort of bucket list. 30 things I want to do or accomplish before I turn 30. (These are in no particular order)

30 before 30 Art Journal Page 1

30 before 30 Art Journal page2

30 before 30
1. Go on a family camping trip.
2. See the ocean and walk on the beach.
3. Take a class just for fun.
4. Become a manager.
5. Go horseback riding.
6. Learn to drive stick shift.
7. Get in the best shape of my life.
8. Climb a rock wall.
9. Visit Washington D.C.
10. Ride on a boat.
11. Read 30 books for fun.
12. Build something.
13. Visit a local Farmer's Market.
14. Get a tattoo.
15. Run in a 5K.
16. Go ziplining.
17. Live in a house.
18. Watch Tyler's list of movies I've never seen.
19. Sell something I have made.
20. Plant a tree/Grow something.
21. Visit a new state.
22. Cook 1 new recipe every month.
23. Go hiking with my camera often.
24. Start blogging twice a week.
25. Ride on a Ferris Wheel.
26. Play paintball.
27. Learn something new.
28. Pay it Forward.
29. Finish a 365 Project.
30. Buy a bike and go riding.

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